Saturday, April 17, 2004

Why

does Carson Daly even have a tv show? My next door neighbour has dark hair and is short and kinda pudgy and likes to listen to rap. Can he get a show, too?

Wednesday, April 07, 2004

Carson Daly, be on notice...

you are my new nemesis.

Reason Number 1

I saw Carson Daly interviewing a rapper who is working in Vancouver. Carson Daly is all "hey man, I been to Vancouver and there ain't much to do there!" (Which, btw, is untrue, but anyway). And the rapper complains that it rains too much (which it does in the winter), and says how he gets sick of seeing the colour green. Then Mr. Ethnic, Carson Daly chimes in and says "you mean too much WHITE". The rapper fellow just kind of looks at him and nods, perhaps thinking to himself, Jesus, this guy is a suck up. So Whitey McWhitster, aka, Carson Daly thinks it's cool to make a racist remark, because it's against white people. I hate that.

Reason Number 2: Carson Daly, Ladies Man

This one is only puzzling to people who do not understand women. The reason Carson Daly, a slightly above average looking, but very short and embarassingly dorky when he tries to be "street" gets the women is because of this simple fact: women have been burned by good looking guys, who are taller, and far less gimpy than Carson , and look at Carson and think that because he is less attractive and shorter than the men they usually date that he will somehow be more grateful to date a "quality babe" and so will treat them better. This might be true in some cases, but Carson Daly is a celebrity so he thinks he is hot shit in his own right and doesn't realize that he is actually a form of the mercy date. This is why the shock, to the women, is doubly upsetting--why he got so horribly roasted by ex-girlfriends. They were thinking they were being kind to date him--he didn't understand that. To the women--this was adding insult to injury since they had already lowered thier standards by even dating him in the first place.

Moral of the story: Do not mercy date Carson Daly--he will not "treat you nicer" than the taller, better looking guys.

Man, when someone starts an email with...

"Thought you'd find this cute." It's a really safe bet that you won't.