Apps I`d like to see

You know those people who really believe their own press.
The kind of people who cannot tell when other people are blowing smoke up their ass. Someone is all OMIGOD you were so great!
And they are all fake modest about it because in reality they actually believe every word the smoke blower is saying.
They believe it in the Thank God someone finally GETS ME kind of way.

I wonder about those people. Do they still believe it when they are alone.
They probably do.
But they also probably have those deep existential moments of doubt.

It would be good if someone would make an app for that.

In the midst of the doubt, your iPhone would pop on and yell something about what a goddam phony you are.
Like a Holden Caulfield app.

What about an app that will tell me when I am getting my flying car and my goddam robot maid. I have been waiting since 1975.

Also, is there an app that can explain to teenagers that it IS in fact exactly like that.